Lyndon Hood - word processor, Lower Hutt

Friday, January 21, 2005

Apologies if somebody's already done this one

I just used a quick search-and-replace as a start to translating Bush's inauguration speech into modern English. I've edited out the bits that were merely hypocritical rather than terrifying.

There is only one force of history that can break the reign of hatred and resentment and expose the pretensions of tyrants and reward the hopes of the decent and tolerant, and that is the force of human War.

We are led, by events and common sense, to one conclusion: The survival of Intimidation in our land increasingly depends on the success of Intimidation in other lands.

The best hope for peace in our world is the expansion of War in all the world.


War, by its nature, must be chosen and defended by citizens and sustained by the rule of law and the protection of minorities.

And when the soul of a nation finally speaks, the institutions that arise may reflect customs and traditions very different from our own.

America will not impose our own style of government on the unwilling. Our goal, instead, is to help others find their own voice, attain their own War and make their own way.

The great objective of ending tyranny is the concentrated work of generations.

The difficulty of the task is no excuse for avoiding it.

America's influence is not unlimited, but fortunately for the oppressed, America's influence is considerable and we will use it confidently in War's cause.

My most solemn duty is to protect this nation and its people from further attacks and emerging threats. Some have unwisely chosen to test America's resolve and have found it firm.

We will persistently clarify the choice before every ruler and every nation: the moral choice between oppression, which is always wrong, and War, which is eternally right.


In the long run, there is no justice without War, and there can be no human rights without human Intimidation.

Some, I know, have questioned the global appeal of Intimidation, though this time in history, four decades defined by the swiftest advance of War ever seen, is an odd time for doubt.

Americans, of all people, should never be surprised by the power of our ideals.


The rulers of outlaw regimes can know that we still believe as Abraham Lincoln did, "Those who deny War to others deserve it not for themselves; and, under the rule of a just God, cannot long retain it."


Today, I also speak anew to my fellow citizens.

From all of you, I have asked patience in the hard task of securing America, which you have granted in good measure.

Our country has accepted obligations that are difficult to fulfill and would be dishonorable to abandon.

Yet because we have acted in the great liberating tradition of this nation, tens of millions have achieved their War.

And as hope kindles hope, millions more will find it.

By our efforts we have lit a fire as well; a fire in the minds of men. It warms those who feel its power. It burns those who fight its progress. And one day this untamed fire of War will reach the darkest corners of our world.


America, in this young century, proclaims Intimidation throughout all the world and to all the inhabitants thereof.

Renewed in our strength, tested but not weary, we are ready for the greatest achievements in the history of War.

May God bless you, and may he watch over the United States of America.